Stress has become something that a majority of Earth’s population believe to be a part of “daily life”. They think it’s normal to put themselves in a position of anger, hatred, jealousy or any other of the negative emotional states throughout the day. Well I personally disagree with this point of view.
Why does stress have to be a part of daily life? Even if things do get difficult during the day, why do they have to put us in a bad mood? The answer is that they DON’T have to do any of those negative things.
I believe the main issue is that people put the “control” outside of themselves. They believe that their “inner” emotional states are controlled by their external surroundings and situations. This is a fundamental flaw that a lot of humans carry, since it’s not widely taught that emotions begin within you, and that YOU are in control of them…
The “control” of your life and emotions is situated inside of you, within your mind, perceptions and body reactions. This is also relatable to “body language”, since we can change our emotional state through moving or holding the body in powerful stances, helping us to feel more in control.
So, the answer is that you are in the drivers seat of your emotions. This means that you have the power within you to decide whether you’re going to be “stressed out” by something or not.
Don’t believe me? During a stressful scenario, who is the person holding onto that stress? Who is the person who carries on thinking about that situation all day/week/month/year long? Who has the reactions, perception and power to frame that scenario AS stressful? Only you do, nobody else…
It can be difficult letting go of stress for good, like letting go of the side of a swimming pool for the first time to experience open waters without aid. But once you get used to it, it’s an incredibly liberating and healthy experience.
So how DO you let go of stress for good? Firstly, it’s vital to realise that you are in control of your emotions. Without knowing this, it’s very difficult to change an inner emotional state, since you’ll be looking for a solution “externally” which will be a never ending search…
After this has been fully realised, the mind consciously lets go of stress almost automatically. Why? Well lets say you were hitting yourself on the head without noticing, and suddenly you realised you’d been doing it, you’d stop it right? It’s the same process with the mind and this inner realisation, why would we continue holding onto stress when the problem or issue has come and gone already?
Notice this information is all about “letting go” of stress. The reason for this is that when stressful situations arise, sometimes it’s inevitable that we’ll become aggravated by them, however learning not to allow the stress to linger within us for longer than the experience itself lasts is VITAL!
Therefore noticing within that you’ve “held on” to some stress longer than needed, is enough to “wake you up” out of it, as it is self-inflicted…
Realisation of “holding onto” stress is actually the main method for “letting go” of stress that I teach, because it is so powerful to have the individual realise that they’re their own problem AND solution!
So the question for you is, how much longer are you going to hold onto things that “stress” you out? Knowing now that you are causing yourself harm, and that there is no solution outside of you, how will you go forward from this?
It’s now a matter of “acceptance” or “stubbornness”. You can either accept that you are or have been causing yourself stress, OR you can remain in the negative emotional states since your pride and stubbornness is unwilling to admit anything.
This might sound blunt, but why beat around the bush? This is self-improvement and sometimes it is sobering and difficult to swallow. But let me tell you, it’s the first step to creating a better, happier, healthier version of you!
I’d like to take this blog post ONE step further by giving you a golden nugget for stress relief and prevention…
Now that we know how to let go of stress for good, why don’t we do something which PREVENTS it from affecting our lives in the first place? As I said earlier, some situations are almost impossible to reframe into something positive, and they can cause us stress, BUT the “letting go” method still applies to those situations.
However, nine times out of ten a stressful scenario ISN’T life changing. It’s something petty and trivial that won’t matter to us in five years time, so why spend longer than five minutes stressing over it?
My prevention method is similar to the “letting go” method of inner realisation. What we’re going to TRY to do is “notice” stressful thoughts as they arise in our minds. In noticing them appearing in the first place, we need to simply “watch” them and allow them to disintegrate from an inner perspective. When we learn not to engage with our thoughts, they have no affect over us. However, when we DO engage with our thoughts, they take over our bodies, emotions, and outer reality.
Through using this method, you can prevent stress from touching you AS it arises due an external situation. Stressful thoughts also pop up in our minds throughout the day, “I have to do this”, “I have to get this done”, “This is happening later which I’m not happy about”. Why are we allowing our negative thoughts to take over our lives so much? Simply notice these thoughts, do NOT engage with them, then watch them dissolve. Then you can move on with your life unaffected by stress.
One of the most important tips I can give you for “nailing” this method, is to do your best to remain fully “conscious” and present during your day to day life. This allows you to be in a better position to “notice” your thoughts as they arise. Then you can either choose to let go of stressful thoughts about previous situations, OR prevent any current negative one’s from affecting you.
I hope you’ve enjoyed this blog post on letting go of stress for good AND stress prevention.
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Rob J. Temple